Cheques and certificates for others will be posted out tomorrow. Many thanks to those who entered this annual competition. There will be consideration soon on the possible theme for the next poetry competition, and the entry form and guidelines will be posted to this site later on this year, probably around August.
This is what the Judge had to say about this poetry competition:
Judges Comments
“My
Passion” Poetry competition run by the Adelaide Plains Poets Inc.
General Remarks.
Firstly let me say that I was very honoured to be asked to
judge your competition and I undertook the task with a certain amount of
apprehension for while I have entered quite a few poetry competitions, I have
never judged one before!
That over I'll commence my task. Overall, I was very
impressed with the general standard of the entries, especially those of the
younger writers which augurs well for the future of poetry writing in this and the wider community.
I do have some general comments about poetry writing which I
hope you won’t mind me passing on as they come from my own experience!
Firstly – try to avoid rhyming, as this can be a trap
for the unwary. If you are a very experienced and established writer by all
means go for it but its restraints are humungus! It prevents a free flow of
emotion and ideas unless in very skilled hands and an inexperienced poet
quickly finds that the rhyme dominates their thought processes and feelings
which is death to a potential poet, I believe.
Secondly rhyming can turn your poem into something
lightweight when you really want a greater impact and at its worst can create
what started off as a good idea into doggerel – so all I'm saying is – beware!
Poets from all age groups fell into this trap I think and did themselves a
disservice in the process.
My next comment is about relevance. Your competition clearly asks for poems about
“My Passion” and a couple of entries made only vague reference (if any ) to
this and that didn't help their cause.
Lastly about passion – all poems should have this as
part of them, it's what makes them a good poem, I believe and that quality
finally is what helped me make my decisions - that and good writing.
What is good writing? That is a subjective view but I think
it's writing that makes you think, sit up and feel and it does it by the way
words, phrases, lines, imagery are mixed, blended, juxtapositioned and created.
Primary Section.
One poem stood out as winner of this section – 'T
– Ball Knight'. Matthew Elkins
The whole poem is a passionate metaphor of knighthood which
is sustained throughout the poem by taut line length, economy of words, imagery
and internal metaphors and similes. A fantastic piece of writing by a primary
school student.
Who would've thought that a passion for T – Ball could
produce a literary work of art?
Secondary Section.
This section proved difficult to judge because there were a
number of very good entries. Unfortunately some entries disqualified themselves
by straying from the topic or not removing typos and spelling errors! Others
found the limiting bind of rhyming hampered their efforts. I was finally able
to select four poems deserving of special
mention. They are – 'A Kiss in an
Hourglass' Lauren Davidson, I Do NOT Want To Participate' Jemimah Bye, 'My
Passion' Meg Eichmann and 'The Whisper of Words' Brynnie Rafe.
They all addressed the topic of Passion in an amazingly
diverse way – passion to write, passion for life and ideas, a passion to be
true to oneself and romantic, physical passion. They all used imagery, line length and blank verse poetic structure
to great advantage so that the message of their poem is impacted on the reader.
However there has to
be an outright winner for this section and it is, 'A Kiss in an
Hourglass' Lauren Davidson. This
poem also carries a metaphor throughout and the writer continues to refer to
this imagery throughout what is quite a short poem. This poem intrigues with
its deceptive simplicity of structure but depth of sensuality. The poet uses
the hourglass image to evoke a sense of time savoured but also lost in an
intensity of momentary physical love. I think it is a very mature poem for this
age group and the topic is handled sensitively and beautifully. Well done!
Open Section.
I also found this section extremely difficult to whittle down
to a short list. Once again the
temptation to rhyme plagued this section too with similar consequences.
However there were a number of excellent entries and I have
to make special mention of the following – 'I caught Enthusiasm' Alison
Barker, 'Viva Verdi' Shelley Hansen (a rare example of rhyming well handled!),
'all passions spent' Avril Bradley, 'Occasionally' Jan Price, 'Tea Leaves' Darrelle Spenceley,
'My Passion', 'Arrival of the Lost Sketch Book' Anna Jacobson, 'Passionfruit'
Bruce Greenhalgh and 'The Quest' (also a well-structured rhyming verse!) Shelley
Hansen. Which only goes to show you need to be an experienced poet to rhyme
successfully and produce good poetry – it can be done!
I finally came down to
two wonderful but very disparate poems one of which – would you believe
rhymes!! They are 'The Quest' Shelley Hansen and 'Arrival of the Lost
Sketchbook' Anna Jacobson. I believe they are equal first prize winners in this
section.
Firstly 'The Quest'. This poem is very reminiscent of the
skill, style and language mastery of the famous English poet Rudyard Kipling.
The poet's management of rhyme, metre, metaphor and alliteration creates a
propelling rhythm and a passionate philosophical message that races along
carrying the reader with it.
The poem appears
deceptively simple in structure but is in fact quite complex. It uses an
a,b,c,b rhyming pattern and a terse alternating10 syllable/9 syllable line in
each four line stanza in this ten stanza poem. To sustain this throughout the
poem while retaining the emotion, narrative and impetus as well as the reader right in there with
you, is a great achievement I think.
''Arrival of the Lost Sketchbook' is quite a different kettle
of fish. Where 'The Quest' was fast paced, forthright and propelling this one
is the reverse. It is reflective, reminiscent and quiet, yet full of brilliant
colour and passionate memory. The poet uses many beautiful descriptive phrases
to bring the thoughts of the subject of the poem to life.
The writer portrays in this narrative poem an elderly artist
crippled with possibly arthritis who was once a painter of vividly coloured and
exhilarating works. She discovers an old sketchbook and her memories of her
past skills and achievements come flooding back in the excitement of her long
remembered creativity and the rainbow hues she used.
The writer has captured not only the brilliant colours but
also the textures and mediums the artist used to work in. The poet give the
reader a sustained portrait in which the subject of the poem traces over the
pastels and paintings and charcoal drawings captured in the sketchbook reliving where she was and how she felt at
the time she did each piece captured in it. The poem ends as the artist closes
the sketchbook, her fingers imbued with the colours she's been tracing. This is
a moving poem of talents lost and memories retrieved told in simple but
luminous three line stanzas.
1 comment:
I love the judge's comments. They and the title of the poems whet my appetite for a read
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